Nebojsa Vilic on Tue, 27 Apr 1999 23:57:25 +0100


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Syndicate: (Fwd) Political Humor


------- Forwarded Message Follows -------
From:          Pavle@aol.com
Date:          Mon, 26 Apr 1999 09:05:33 EDT
Subject:       Political Humor




This just in, from one of "GRAVY's" Washington correspondents. 
[contributed by John Lynch] 
This apparently is circulating around Pentagon circles!
     
News flash:
     
U.S. TO BEGIN BOMBING ENGLAND UNLESS PEACE ACCORD IS 
RATIFIED BY ENGLAND AND BREAK-AWAY PROVINCE OF N. IRELAND
     
   The White House - President Clinton announced today an all out 
bombing offensive against England will begin in two weeks, unless a 
peace accord is ratified by England and its break-away province of 
Northern Ireland. "Using the fine logic we crafted in the Kosovo 
intervention, we have decided to add, incrementally, to the list of 
peace initiatives around the world," he said in a prepared statement. 
A background briefing indicated that on a weekly schedule, the 
Clinton administration would intervene in the following areas:
     
Week one -- Bombing of England to free Northern Ireland
     
Week two -- Bombing of Ankara, Baghdad and Teheran to free the Kurds
     
Week three -- Bombing of several random African countries to stop 
the Hutus from killing Tutsis
     
Week four -- Bombing of both Istanbul and Athens to solve the 
Cyprus problem
     
Week five -- Bombing of Madrid to free the Basque Country
     
Week six -- Bombing of Ottawa to free the Quibicois
     
Week seven -- Bombing of Jakarta to free the Timor Islands
     
Week eight -- Bombing of New Delhi to free the Tamil peoples of Sri Lanka
     
Week nine -- Bombing of Paris to free Corsica
     
Week ten -- Bombing of Washington, D.C. to free the Confederate 
of Southern States, held captive for 139 years
     
   "This schedule will do until we can come up with others," said 
Madeline Albright, Secretary of State. She did not respond when 
asked when the bombing of Beijing in order to free Tibet would occur.
     
********************************************






Nebojsa Vilic, Ph.D.
Faculty of Drama Arts
University 'SS. Cyril and Methodius'
Ruger Boskovic b.b. / P.O.Box 134
MK-91000 Skopje, Macedonia
tel. 389 91 37 05 96

e-mail: nvilic@soros.org.mk
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