Paul Wouters on Tue, 10 Mar 1998 12:49:52 +0100 (MET)

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<nettime> When Scientologists attack

>From Film Threat Weekly : Mar. 9th, 1998 : Slate II, Take 10

John Travolta, Tom Cruise, Jenna Elfman, Kirstie Alley, CNN's Greta Van
Susteran, and Bart Simpson (Nancy Cartwright).  What do they all have in
common?  Are they all starring in Fox's "When Scientologists Attack"?  Close.
The answer: They are all members of Lafayette Ronald Hubbard's The Church of
    Have you ever wondered what these celebrities find so appealing about this
controversial, non-profit organization?  Well, we at Film Threat have sent out
our crack team of reporters (intrepid interns high on caffeine using netscape)
and found that answer in the form of a cartoon.  Yes, a cartoon.  This
brilliant animated film is the story that only the highest church members (or
the richest celebrities) have actually seen.
     Dr. Benjamin Wog, a noted critic of the church, recently unearthed this
controversial masterpiece during one of his many hours of investigation. "Pay
attention to the volcano in the cartoon, there is one on every cover of
    Now you can learn all about the volcano, space aliens and the
Intergalactic Overlord, named Xenu (pronounced "Ze-new"). This cartoon, in
RealVideo format, narrates the story in L. Ron Hubbard's own words. Save the
$360,000 you would pay the church to discover the secret of the galaxy and
simply click on one of the sites below.
     The cartoon was originally included in a 1988 BBC documentary on
Scientology titled "Panorama". You can find "Panorama" in its entirety here:
     In its latest incarnation a music track and a bit of extra, goofy
narration was added to enhance the enjoyment of Hubbard's wacky space opera.
(You'll need RealPlayer 5.0, available at  Unfortunately,
RealPlayer is not available on MAC. If you have a MAC, run and find someone
with a PC.)
     As unbelievable as this cartoon's story might be, it is all based on the
actual info as taught at the higher levels of the church, according to Dr.
Wog. This cartoon is extremely informative and definitely worth your time.

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